It's a boy!

So last Friday I went to my ultrasound and found my baby is a boy! I would have been content with any gender but am I happy that I am getting a boy! I can feel him moving inside of me already. He's not as active yet or maybe because my placenta is in the anterior side of my body and makes it seem like he's not moving as much when in reality he probably is already doing kung-fu kicks in there.

My body has been taking on a toll though. Most days I can barely roll over in bed or get out of bed and walking is a different story. My body feels like it's going to split in half sometimes. Lately I've been trying to sleep with the pillow between my legs. The first few times was a fail but last night was actually okay. Trying to keep it between my legs has kept me up a lot during the night but this morning, I felt really good. I didn't feel as much pain as I usually did. I hope it only gets better.

Ella has been the cutest but along with that cuteness has been outright naughtiness! She sees, wants, and chews on everything. And lately has been knocking her head everywhere. I can't even count how many times she's fallen off the bed! Ugh.. I hate seeing her like that. I just gotta keep remembering to put her in her crib instead. It's hard cause it takes so much working putting her in there. My back just isn't capable of that labor anymore.. My body is definitely falling apart.

Christmas was great. Had a wonderful time with both sides of the family. We spent the first part of the day at my mom's and the second half at my dad's. We didn't leave North Branch until 10:30pm that night. I'm glad Thou's neices had fun! They usually don't go around my family much but it's really about time they get acquainted with each other. It's just too Nok and Noy weren't able to join us at all that day.

Anyway, now that Christmas is over, I am looking forward to New Year's Eve! And with the kids too. I just booked a room for two nights in Wisconsin Dells at the Wilderness Resort. I absolutely cannot wait to go! Just two more days!!! Eeep! It's so awesome because they have a New Year's Eve party for the kids too. They are going to pee themselves! lol. Can't wait to take pictures of them with my new Canon Rebel. Awesome, awesome! Ella is going to be tired out for sure! lol. My poor Ella, I hope she doesn't get too drained from this vacation.

My beautiful healthy boy!:

My Ella is growing up way too fast. Sunday she'll already be exactly 8 months! She is just a ball of energy too. You just cannot keep her out of your site for a second because she'll somehow end up somewhere totally unexpected. She's already mastered holding onto things and helping herself get up but now she is slowly walking while holding on to something. I smell trouble already..!

Anyway, my ultrasound is next Friday and I am super nervous and excited! I have a feeling it's going to be a girl again. Ella is going to be a big sister! It's so hard to imagine Ella playing this role since she is still my little baby but I'm sure it'll all fall into place once baby is here. Cannot wait to have a little baby again! Eeeks. =D

Last night I left Ella with Auntie April while I headed back home to study for a quiz today. It was nice to be able to study but when I was ready for bed, it took me 3 hours to get fall asleep! I missed my baby so much. I think studying a good sacrifice to be able to have Ella next to me. I love that little booger.

I get the feeling that Ella is starting to have separation anxiety. This past weekend, it was so hard to leave her just for a second without her whining and screaming for me. It's great to feel wanted but if this keeps up, I won't be able to get anything done! Daddy blames me for being too loving towards her. Is there such a thing?

Anyway finals are next week and I am EXCITED! I cannot wait to put all my crap away and not have to worry about lugging around a 10lb backpack for 3 weeks. Not a lot of time but this will feel like a lifetime! One of the instructors stressed that 2nd semester will be even crazier... I can only imagine!

Pregnancy with baby #2 is going really smoothly. I forget I'm pregnant most of the time! I just can't believe I am almost halfway with it already. With Ella, it felt like a lifetime. Daddy and I find the sex of the baby on the 22nd. An early Christmas present! I haven't even begun to think of names. I think I might just let the name come naturally this time. I'm so happy to be done with all the nausea and the smell sensitivity at the moment. I was talking to Thou and I think I might want one more after this one and then I am done! Hopefully the 3rd baby will come in after I'm done with school. Not sure how I'm gonna deal with this 2nd one with school so close.. Just happy that it's close to finals that I'll be have it. =D

I'm a little sad tonight.

Ella is the freaking cutest thing everrr! Yesterday, daddy came home and put on this YouTube video for her and she started bopping her head. That was the first time I've ever seen her do anything like that! It was soooo adorable! We replayed it but she didn't do it again. I hope that wasn't just a fluke because I wanna see her do it again tonight. LOL. I love my little times with my little baby girl. Cannot even imagine my days without her.. Her daddy didn't get home until almost midnight last night and he tried to play with her but ended up kissing her way too much with his scruffy beard and she hates it! She makes this duck face that I only see her make with him! She gets so mad and turns her face and starts whining. Daddy is so not gentle with her at all. My poor baby. Makes me miss her.. Cannot wait to see her little face later!

My Ella is crawling! And is she a fast crawler. If I'm not paying even for a minute, she is across the room already! It's amazing how much she's grown in just the past month. In the past few days, I've even start putting her in her crib for the whole night. Though I did cheat a little last night. She woke up at probably around 4 a.m. and wanted her bottle but instead of just making her one, I took her out of her crib and put her next to me and then made her one. Well that wasn't the best choice but as I was making her bottle, she cried and cried! I'm beginning to notice that she does this most when she's next to me or knows when someone's there to let out her screams to. In her crib and with us out of view, she's like the perfect angel. Mama must be doing something wrong-spoiling her perhaps. I say it's time for a new routine. With this second one coming, I just won' t have to time to cater to my little girl like I want to. =(

Anyway, I've been slacking on taking pictures of her and taking videos of her. My next project is tape her crawling. It's adorable and I can't help and laugh at how fast she goes.

My ultrasound for baby #2 was on September 29th and they were able to tell me that I was 8 weeks pregnant which means I"m currently 11 weeks pregnant now! Almost 3 months already. The morning sickness is slowly subsiding but I still feel it nonetheless. It's horrible.I was just describing it to Thou and how I wished for migraines instead of nausea. *knock on wood. Anyway just a few more winks and I'll be welcoming the 2nd trimester with open arms! Other than that I find that I'm not as tired as I was when I had Ella. This one doesn't leave me with heartburn which is a wonderful plus.

As for baby Ella, she is growing so fast! She is already 6 months and possibly the size of a 9 month old if not bigger! Some lady came over to my mom's house one day and was wondering why Ella wasn't crawling yet. I know she's big but she's not that big?? Her favorite pass-time at the moment is rolling to get where she needs to get to which has already brought on trouble. Just about a week ago, I was cleaning the bathroom and Ella was hanging out on the bed. While cleaning I peeked at her every few minutes but the minute I didn't look up she decides to do a face-plant from the bed to the ground. My heart dropped to the ground and I have never moved so fast in my life. My baby was crying so hard and I felt so helpless that I wanted to cry with her. I felt like a horrible, horrible person. She didn't cry very long but it was the most terrible feeling I've ever felt with her. Never letting that ever happen again. Other than moving around like a pro, my baby is talking more and more. She also knows how to extend her arms out for you to pick her up. We've also introduced solids to her for almost 2 months already and she's loving it. She is just silly. I love her little quirks and the little sounds she makes when she's just sitting there staring out the car window. They sound like little whispers. What a sweet, happy baby. <3 her so much.

Ella is getting bigger everyday! She can already sit up and reach for things...though some of those things are like 10 feet away, she still tries to reach her hands out for it. Lol. Work and school has been hectic! Every weeknight I get home at 9pm and I just wanna knock out. All of my home chores have been put aside for the time being. It doesn't help that I am expecting AGAIN too. Oyy. What did I get myself into? I was feeling tired, nauseous again and thought I'd take a pregnancy test for the hell of it and I couldn't believe it!!

Hence, the second test:

I have an appointment this Friday to get blood drawn and all the poking that happened not so long ago... I think this pregnancy might be worst this time around, the first part of it anyway..

God help me.

Fall almost in full effect.

Vacation was wonderful! Had a great time visiting Ella's grandma and auntie in Biloxi. They also insisted on taking care of Ella while Tevin, me and Thou made a trip down to Louisiana-New Orleans to be exact. It was a great time but we were so beat that we slept early and left early the next day! I surprisingly was not worried about Ella at all the whole time. She was in good hands. I think it was pretty hard for grandma and auntie to let her go when we left Biloxi. I hope we make down there in November to spend time with them.

After Biloxi we left straight to North Port to visit my brother. What a long road trip, but thanks to Thou for driving 90% of the time! What a great man. =) We even had time to visit his brother in Orlando for a night. It just seemed like we had no time this time around.

Ella did so good on the plane ride-actually the whole trip for that matter. So blessed. <3

Waterpark fun!

Had such a blast at the water park this past Saturday. We took the kids to the Bloomington pool and I swear, anytime I'm around any kind of pool, I turn into this kid that's high off of caffeine (even Ella seemed to be enjoying it.) The diving board was the best part of the day. We all kept trying to do somersaults into the water but it just wasn't working. I did manage to do a leg flop and it ended up hurting like hell and decided to quit after that. We couldn't get enough of it and planned to hit Bunker Beach for their wave pool the next day but none of the girls had their suits so we stayed in. Good times.

P.S. No more cheating on my diet!!! From now on, I gotta be more strict!

Working out.

I'm excited to say that I'm working out again. Thou and I joined Lifetime Fitness this time and I have to say, I'm very impressed with the place! I love it and have totally taken advantage of everything there. I've tried the cycling class, cardio kickboxing, Zumba and hip hop class. My favorite so far is cardio kickboxing and the hip hop class. I've been trying to get out there everyday but unfortunately I've only been able to get out there twice this week and it's already Thursday! Poo! Totally making up for it tomorrow after work and Saturday morning.

The vacation is also fast approaching. We've only got 2 more weeks which means only 2 more weeks until I can get my semi-beach body! Crossing my fingers I last with my workout until the very last day before we leave!

Time passes by..

It's funny how as I grow older I expect to gain more friends along the way, but it seems like all I've lost are friends. Now I can only count two people who I can truly call friends (not including Thou or family members.) For a time or two I had a handful of them and now I can't even think of anyone to call or hang out with anymore.. Am I that really incompetent that I'm unable to hold onto friends?

Maybe it does take more effort to keep and maintain friends than I thought but frankly, I may not have the energy for it anymore. I just believe that if we were truly friends, that we would understand that we are busy people with hectic lifestyles and that it prohibits us from doing as much as we did before. I don't think it should anything, but apparently for some it does.

It's sad to see that so many friends have come and gone.

Excited!

So excited for our trip in August! We're heading to FL again and then Mississippi to visit Ella's grandma and hoping to swing by North Port to see my brother Xiong and possibly do some deep ocean fishing! I hope this trip will be more nice to me as the last time I was pregnant. Please, do not be or get pregnant! *prays

J4

So happy to know that we aren't doing the J4 booth again this year! What a weight off my shoulder especially with the 4 day notice! Not cool. Anyway, just two more days and it's a 3-day weekend for me, though we have no plans, I'm looking forward to spending the whole weekend with my favorite girl, Ella. I miss her so much today! Can't wait to see her tiny face after work.

If there isn't anything to do, I wouldn't mind going away to Wisconsin Dells for the weekend. But we'll see what the boo has to say about that.

Gloomy day

Another 45 minutes and I am officially off work for the day. Today was one of those days where time just wouldn't move and there just wasn't enough work to help keep my mind off going home.

Nonetheless, that time is almost here. I can't wait to go home to Ella. Daddy is picking her up so I can just go straight home. I have so many errands to run but I think I'll hold off until tomorrow.

Ella turns 2 months

Happy two months to my dear daughter Ella Xayavong. I can't believe she is already two months already. Time is definitely not stopping. Our lives have changed so much and all for the better. There isn't a single day that I don't look forward to her little face and smile. I love my little Astro Girl.

Happy birthday, Ella. Mommy loves you. (Here she is about at about 8 weeks.)

Back to work

It's officially my second day of work back and I hate it! I miss my mornings with Ella so much. It's been so hard having to get up so early and knowing I have to prepare her to just simply drop her off at my mom's and not being able to see her for 8 - 10 hours! I don't understand why during the most crucial time in our baby bonding that us mothers have to be so away for so long without our baby. I do realize that having a job right now is crucial so I guess I better just suck it up..

Anyway, we're planning a trip down to FL and Mississippi really soon to visit Ella's grandma, uncle and aunts. I would really love to travel when it's cooler but when school comes around, time won't be so nice anymore. I can't wait for them to meet her and it'll be nice to get away from MN for a little.

Baby update!

Today my baby is officially 7 weeks and 4 days old! She is growing so fast and learning things everyday. Her developments have gotten more and more advance. She's starting to smile when I talk to her now. Also when she cries, she knows when I'm close by and cries even louder. What a brat. 

My bond with her and growing everyday but I'm sad to say that her dad's bond with her hasn't been quite as strong. It would be nice if he'd try a little harder. 

Anyway, I've been recording her almost every week. Here are some videos of my baby as she has grown in the past few weeks.

Ella Xayavong

She's perfect.

I love the little squeaks she makes when we pick her up, or turn her around. I love her beautiful head of hair. Her big brown eyes and the way she looks around at all her surroundings. I love the way she smiles in her sleep and how her tongue sticks out while doing it. I love how her head rests on my shoulder when she is getting tired and knocks out that way. I love giving her kisses on her cheeks and lips and how she almost smiles when you do it. She is the most precious thing in the world. I love her so much!

Baby is here!

Ella Xayavong was born exactly on her due date April 17, 2011 at 6lbs and 15oz, and measuring at 19". As of last Thursday, she weighed at 7lbs and 13oz, measuring at 20".

I began to feel my labor pains at 10:00am on April 16 and began counting them closer and closer. And finally I told Thou that we should just go just in case it was time. It wasn't how I pictured the trip to be at all. I pictured us frantically rushing to get things ready to go and me screaming at the top of lungs on the way to the hospital. But that didn't happen. Everything was so calm, we were even thinking of stopping at IHOP to grab breakfast but opted for McDonald's instead.

When I arrived at the hospital, it was confirmed that I was indeed in labor. I was then placed in a labor room and they began monitoring my contractions and heart rate. I was immediately put on an IV and later on, antibiotics for my Strep B. As time progressed my labor pains got worse and worse. I tried laying in bed at first when the pain wasn't too bad but that soon got uncomfortable. I then tried a rocking chair, but the wood I was sitting on was sooo unbearably uncomfortable. Finally the nurse brought in a ball and that was so much better. I must have sat on that ball for about 3 hours before they put on the bed on again.

When the doctor finally came into see me, she confirmed that I was almost already 100% effaced but only about 4 inches dilated and if I wanted to, in the next two, she'd pop my water to keep the labor moving faster. I couldn't agree more with it.

After the two hours, the doctor came in and popped my water. It was painless but omg, the labor pains got worse and worse!! I was cringing at each contractions. I tried to hold on as long as I could..3 hours to be exact. I asked for medicine finally and they came in with some medicine to inject into the IV but it did absolutely nothing! They came in with a second dose and tried that again, but again, it only sedated me for a quick second and the pains came back in full force. Finally at about 9:30ish, I couldn't take it anymore, I finally gave in and asked for Epidural. It was the best decision I ever made.

After that, I could still feel the pressure of the contractions but no more pain. I even got to rest a little. At around 11pm, the nurse came into check my cervix and confirmed that I was about 10cm dilated and that we could get going with labor. Upon hearing this, my body began to shake and I felt like I was shivering the whole time.. (adrenaline?)

Giving birth was the easiest thing in the whole process. I started pushing right around midnight and 8 minutes later, she was born! I tore a lot of stuff in the process but I was so happy to have her that I didn't even care.. I cried tears of joy of finally having her, my beautiful Ella. <3

Today.

I'm so emotional today.. There are so many things running through my head at the moment. I'm not sure if it's baby hormones or if I'm just having one of those days, but I hate feeling like this, especially at work.

I just want the baby out now! I feel so fat and ugly!

Four more weeks...

and I am miserable! I suppose it probably could be worse but I am getting really bad hip pains when I walk-almost as if my legs are about to break off any second, I've got back pains, nausea, heartburn, the constant need to pee! I'm just hoping my busy schedule is enough exercise to get this baby out as soon as possible.. Besides I'm really eager to see my baby girl. =D

Besides that, everything is going good and smoothly. Work is good-busier than ever! School is okay. I haven't gotten really used to the time change yet; still a struggle to wake up early everyday. The bf is good and Tev's doing good. Life is okay. I still wished we had a house.. But it'll be worth it to wait..

Breaking up or making up...

It's all the same to me. I'll live and survive regardless. The most important thing to me right now is my baby and my family and as long as I have them behind me 100% I know I'll always have a home and I'll always be okay.

Frustrated.

Im so frustrated. What I'm frustrated about isn't even the initial problem. I'm so annoyed at the fact that when I wanna talk about something that he wants to avoid completely, he goes off!! I fckn hate it and I can strangle a nigga for real! DO NOT TEST ME!

Success!

The baby shower was a success! We almost ran out of food.. Worst feeling ever but thank God for kaphoon and my wonderful sister-in-law Nok for making it. We got so many great gifts! Hopefully this'll last us for awhile. There are still a few things we need to cover like a humidifier, a crib, a play pen, and among other things and then we are set. We didn't get much clothes either so I'll definitely have fun shopping for it!

Baby has been moving more than ever. It's good because at least I know she's healthy and strong in there. I feel her the most when I'm lying down or if I'm starving.. I really can't wait to hold her.

Work and school-wise have been great. School's been relatively easy. I'm glad I took an easier load this semester. I'm preparing for my wondeful program I've been so nervous about getting into! I'm sooo happy! Eeks.

Work is also going great for me. I just got a 4% raise the other day due to my exceptional job here at the House of Hope! *pat on my back! =D I'm hoping I can keep this job once I start my radiology tech program at school! *cross fingers

Things are going really good and I pray it stays this way.

31 Weeks

Omg! My baby is getting bigger everyday, not to mention my tummy! I'm starting to have pain under my belly and I'm not sure why.. Maybe it's the heaviness. I have an appointment on Monday so I'll have to ask my doctor about it. Only 8 more weeks to go. I really hoping by some chance or miracle that this pregnancy doesn't get worse. I can feel myself start to waddle and not only that I can only fit into two of my pants now.. This morning I got up to find something to wear and came across my size 3 pants that I wore just before my pregnancy, and thought, "How in the hell did I fit into this before?!" Crazy.

Anyway, my baby shower is this weekend already. I still can't figure how fast 1 month 1/2 flew by so quickly.

Life is changing so much! It's going good. Thou and I are great and stronger than ever before. I love him so much and thank God everyday for him. I dont know how I ever did it without him before.

Fuck YOU!

Ella

I love her so much already. Im going into my 3rd trimester now and I can feel her moving more than ever! It brings a smile to my face each and everytime. I wish I could see what my little gir's doing in there. What a silly girl.

Almost just 2 1/2 months away from seeing her now. I can't wait any longer!

27 weeks

I can't believe I'm already almost at the end of my second trimester. In exactly three months, I'll already be due! Where has the time gone? I'm thankful that's it's flown by thanks to my crazy, hectic schedule and busy, busy life. Not only am I anticipating the birth of my baby in a few months, my birthday is tomorrow, then I have dinner with my friends and family on Friday night, then our one year anniversary on the 29th, then finally, my babyshower in on February 15! Overwhelming year it's been already! It does not stop there either.. Eeks!

Break

It's been a pretty nice break from school and some of work so far. Most of what we've been doing is just homebodying and to tell you the truth, it's driving me a little crazy. I need to get out and do something, if nothing fun, at least something productive. I'm back to work this week which I'm a little relieved of and then next week I'll be back to school! I'm excited for the classes especially for Biomedical Ethics! I've been reading the text required for the class and so far it's been interesting.

I'm still waiting on word if I get into the program or not still... I'm crossing my fingers hard for this one! I hope I get in! =/